SOOO...I feel bad for whining again. I am not a whiner but now sometimes the past only intensifies the present. I can't help but feel the guilt of my bad choices that led to my leaving Chris to get better because I was weak and now Chris is dead and I will never feel blameless and that sometimes makes me wish I were dead.
But I shouldn't take it out on you guys so I want you to know you're a beautiful bunch of ladies and I appreciate you very much.