Hi Guys,
I went to see Jack Johnson last night. Other than freezing my butt off, many memories of hawaii and life before this life. It was pretty emotional for me...Jack...he's like one of the boyz...that hawaii bond and he reminds me so much of my Chris at times...like-minds
Aly and my sister went with me...he's giving away all the money for his tour AGAIN...Gotta love Jack
I hadn't been to a concert in decades.
My jewelry making is continuing to remind me of what a gift from God is because I did not have this kind of creative flow ever. And I know my Chris is a Huge part of anything I've done. I still am amazed at a completed piece...I'm designing Jewelry...go figure.
Just what Chris wanted me to do.
Ironically my ineptness on this computer has got me again as far as getting anything out there...I have a name. True Love Remembers...Chris's favorite song and a comment on tatoos Chris made shortly before his death...Remember was one he would do to acknowlege loved ones lost. I'm registered on etsy but the pictures have me. So I continue to create because thats what I do now. I told my therapist I sometimes felt overwhelmed about the lack of progress on that side...she said that with each piece I was sharing Chris's love so I keep going.
Gifts ...
I've had a few lately besides my jewelry. My therapist got me into an awesome workshop on Mindfulness-based stress reduction...all about living life with intention not on auto-pilot being present in this moment...I don't think we can be anymore present to our moment of pain but there is more for us to do.
I'm being taught or shown how to accept all of this horrible nightmare as part of my life through meditation and remembering to breath...Chris liked to tell me Breath Mama and here I am in a workshop on just that. It's quite a gift but it is incredibly hard.
Back to the jewelry and gifts. A few weekends ago a neighbor who has the coolest yard in the neighborhood when she heard I collected beach glass invited me over to get some as she had just come back from Fort Bragg. When I got there I discovered she had been collecting for 25 years and had glas from all over the world...did I mention I love beach glass...she gave me so many beautiful pieces and colors I would never have, now in my life.
The next weekend I recieved maybe 100 authentic trading beads from a friend of my Dad's who had already given me some that I made the coolest necklace from but now...wow.
Of course I had asked the Big Guy and my boy if maybe I could have some kind of sign...
And did I mention my 2yr 3mo old grandson Ezra has started making jewelery that we all would wear...my daughter will not let me market our earth angel but the thought did cross my mind...he'll string beads for an hour I'm told. I can't wait until he tells us what colors he'd like to work with...Ezra...God's ultimate gift to us at such a devastating time but Ez is here thankfully.
love to you today
I forgot to mention the workshop feels horrible sometimes, like great now I get it...IT'S ANOTHER BIG WHAT IF...if only I had been more presnt and aware before this happened.
It's all good stuff but it will never stop this pain that continues to fester.
I didn't want you all to think I'm thinking I found a cure...what I'm finding is compassion and no one in the class knows my pain. They're just people trying to be more present on this planet, they seem to have a kind energy going on
Dear Lois
I was wondering how the jewelry was making out.That is a beautiful name you chose for it.Chris inspired, better yet.I would love to see some of your pieces but will wait patiently till you can get some up.Ezra doing stringing is great.A little legacy that you can share with him,yes children can def brighten a dark day.How wonderful that your neighbor and dad's friend shared these beautiful things with you.It proves that there are people out there that care.I hope you find some happiness in your workshop also.I think that finding our own niches somewhere, somehow will keep us in the forward direction.Thanks for sharing some good news with us,I do look forward to those days when I can feel some excitement coming from a fellow MOM.Love and God Bless
