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Trial

Status hearing notes that Trial Date remains the same 11/29/10, status hearing was held yesterday. So I guess and hope this will be a definite. Seeing it in print just makes me more nervous, scared and just totally stressed out. So worried I won't make it thru this in one piece.

Re: Trial

Bette
You will make through you will muster the strength. Timmy will be with you and we will all be there in spirit. It won't be easy hearing everything that happened and reliving that night. It was really hard having to sit in the same room with the POS and not being able to do or say a thing to him, seems unreal that we are sitting in the same room with the POS that murdered our child and having to play nice. I am just so sorry that for most of you it takes so long to even get to trial that is one spot on this road that we all want to get past. Even though the outcome for me was a good one it didn't help my heart it did though help my mind.
Love ya
Big Jim's Mom

Re: Trial

Thanks Shirley, I just worry so much that I won't make it thru and knowing my Mom's will be there even in spirit will help me thru it!! I know at the prelim they were behind bullet proof glass and it was still an odd feeling seeing them there, and this will be open and I just don't know, I just am so scared about the whole thing. No I don't think it will ever do any of any good for our hearts, unless we can get our babies back. I'm scared that's what I feel right now.

Love ya too (((hugs)))
Bette

Re: Trial

Dear Bette
I'm sorry that you have been feeling so lousy.Timmy's trial starts on a Monday so since I am off on Momdays I expect to be there.I remember back in April when we were in the courtroom for the first time with no glass,feet from Nicky's murderer how sick I felt.As you know he was pleading for a new lawyer which meant a new date.Six weeks before the trial was to begin and they cancel the date for another year,so like you, it will be over 3 yrs till we see justice for Nicky.I could cry and shake my head but I knew I had to "behave" because after all they have all the rights and God forbid we would actually be allowed to show our emotions or what we really thought.But there is always the impact statement right? Have you started yours? Mine was finished,I just hope when the time comes I can read it in it's entirety.If they try to cut it short or not let all of us speak well that's when I'll lose it big time.I mean that's the only time when we'll be allowed to voice our feelings.Not that they care but it's all we have right? So mama know that wherever I'm sitting in the courtroom that day know that all your sista MOMS will be with you there too.It's a shame no cameras are allowed in the courtroom can you see all our angels hovering around and the orbs that would show up when the film was developed.LOL.As I 'm writing this I got to chuckle a little at the thought of our babies all together and one is tripping the POS'S and the another is smacking them upside the head or another, tongue tying the lawyers and they look around and no one is there HA HA.Can't you just see our little pranksters? Hang in there Bette,you've already been through the worst of the worst.If you're up to lunch and a visit to the cemetary this weekend let me know we are long overdue,give me a call.Love ya girl

Re: Trial

Hi Barb,
sorry just got your reply today, I would have loved to do lunch!!! Maybe next weekend?? That would be great! You know I think of you so much with the trial and what happened, that's one of the things I'm most worried about is finally getting to that stage and they turn around and postpone it, and a whole year! It's just unimaginable and I don't know how you didn't freak out LOL. Yes I can see all our angels, they bring me inspiration knowing that we fight for them!!! Still makes me so nervous and scared to think of siting thru this but I know I have to be strong for my family and for Timmy he deserves this, he deserves JUSTICE, they took away a 15 year old for what being there at the wrong time, and another young man for his color???? I'll never understand the evil that lurks within any of these ppl who can destroy lives and whole families with a single act of violence. I try, but I can't and know I'll never understand why any of this happened to any of us. I know it's on a Monday but that is supposed to be jury picking and I was told I didn't have to go, which I don't think I will be because it's going to be long and I dont think I can handle sitting there longer than I have to, but most likely the trial will start the following week. You know I'll keep you up to date as I hope I can get as many ppl as I can even for just one day to be there and show support for Timmy so they all can see how much he was loved and how much he is missed and what an impact this was on everyone!!!!!! THEY NEED TO SEE THAT!!!! Let me know about getting together I'd love to. Next Sat. is National Rememberance Day for Murdered Victims, I hope everyone has their candles out if they are not attending anything, I am going to my local POMC, they have a beautiful garden I just did a small one for Timmy yesterday, not much yet but they wanted me to get something started, took them 3 years to get me to have the courage to do one. We will be going there that night, they do a beautiful ceremony, of course all I do is cry but I'm hoping my boys will go with me this year, Matt went last year and now Joey wants to go too!!! Love all my mom's and angels

Bette

Re: Trial

I can't even begin to think what you must be going through. When Nanci had her trial for Travis it was so surreal I couldn't even believe they were really at trial. Ours is scheduled for November 8 but I doubt it will be a go....So we aren't even prepared for it or even thinking about it because it has been so **** long and ridiculous it is like it will never happen. Wow what a surprise if they call us and tell us we are really going to trial...Yeah right what was a thinking that ain't gonna happen. Luv ya and know we will be right there beside you and on the other end of the hot line if you need us....Laura & AV

Re: Trial

Bette, You are stronger than you think and you will make it through the trial. Just keep in mind that we are all with you in spirit if not in person. I wish I lived closer to you because I would definitely be there.Will you have some people from your local POMC there? I hope so cause I know that having that support helps. There were a lot of friends and family with me for the hearing and sentencing of the POS that murdered Keara. I do know that it is a relief to have that part over with. At least you won't have to agonize over that anymore as long as it happens when they say it will. Let us know if there is anything we can to to help. Love ya, Darien

Re: Trial

Thank you Laura & AV, I know how agonized you guys are over all the bull**** you have been put thru. It's just not right and I do hope that you do get somewhere on Nov. 8th, I hope it does happen!!! Justice is all we want, besides having this never to have happened and our babies back home with us, I could never imagine what it is like not knowing, I don't know how bad that could be than to be agonizing over a trial and being put thru all those terrible moments all over again. If that makes any sense!!! I don't make sense much anymore, what I think I'm trying to say is, is it better to know and go thru all this, then not to know and agonize over who it could have done this and never have justice for your child???? I think both are pretty bad, I know I went thru that for 14 months and it was awful and I pray for all those moms who haven't had their childs justice done for them. We need to know that these POS's are paying somehow for what they did!!!

Darien thanks so much and yes I will have family, my boys, and friends who can come when they can as it is going to be very long and arduous. I know you all will be with me in spirit and it gives me strenghth. I'm just a mess right now things have been so bad lately I just don't know how I'll make it thru any of this, then after, then what??? I just don't know it's eating me up, my heart is just so broken.

Love you all!!!!
Bette