the day I feel up to going onto Timmy's site and maybe write a few things or add more pictures i can't even get it to upload. agggghhhh

I wanted to get ready for St. Paddy's day, you know how he was so proud to be Irish :) Well I did do some pics on that Kimi site, so I have some new ones I wanted to add, Iknow I have time. It's just the day I'm up to it and can't get on. Just like when I went to the cemetary finally we had one nice day so I needed to get his Christmas stuff i had put down off, and it was about 5" of mud, I nearly sunk into it! Then I broke alot of the stuff cause under neath the mud was solid ice!!!! and it was deceiving day because there it was freezing and windy and I had to leave it halfway finished with Valentine's day stuff, haven't been able to get back again cause it's been so cold out.

I need the warm spring air maybe that will make me feel alittle better.

Luv yas
God Bless
Bette
Timmy's mom

OH Bette,
What can anyone say to all of that except you hang in there. It was good to see you in the chat room...and as far as the memory sites go they are working on them and hope to have the problems fixed by the first of the month...keep our fingers crossed and get your pointer finger ready if they are not done by then!!!We will need you!!! Take care all of our Love...Laura & AV

It was good to be there too, but I had a very bad night. Went to bed right after, kept hearing noises, and kept waking up. I woke up at 4:20 and thought that was the time Joey woke me up that morning, why did I wake up exactly that time and think exactly that thought. I had a dream about Timmy right after that it woke me up with a start where I heard myself gasp, but I can't remember the dream. I'm tired and miserable today, i have a heavy heart.

God Bless
Bette
Timmy's mom

Bette
I think part of it is you are now living alone and at first that is very hard it will get easier. After Jim was murdered someone from my family always stayed with me all night I finally told them they didn't have to. I went through the hearing noises and waking up also I lived alone before that but always knew if I had a problem Jim was only a phone call away. I still have some bad nights when I wake with those terrible images in my minds eye,it takes awhile to shake them off. You have been through so much lately I wish I could give you a great big hug. But since I can't give you one in person I am sending you a cyber hug.
(((((((HUG))))))))) And much love to go along with it.
Big Jimz Mom Shirley

Dear Bette Oh girlfriend I am so sorry that things are not going so well.I wanted you to know that if on a Tues,Wed, or Thurdsay night you wake up and can't get back to sleep I work the overnight shift and am a local call for you.I will email you my work number and if you can't sleep call me.Of course if it is a Fri,Sat,Sun or Mon night you can just call my house.I'm up at all hours of the night.God Bless and many,many hugs to you Love Barb

Awww Barb, that's so nice of you, thanks for the offer. I just am having hard times again, Shirley you may be right but Matt was out alot so I was kind of used to it but I guess I always knew he was coming home. Plus I have my big doggie barker LOL and she didn't make a sound so I know it was just me. But I had a weird dream about Timmy which I don't remember but it woke me up with a gasp. Which is unusual for me and that was after I woke up at 4:20 and why did that come to my mind???? That was the time Joe woke me up that day. There are nights i wake up at all hours all night long, but last night at 4:20 and then to think that in a sleepy state of mind? Just saddens me to no end. I am pms'ing too so that doesn't help, my back hurts, I'm tired and I'm doing a lot of crying again. It hit me hard last night I was terrible that's why I got off a chat, it just really shattered me. Then to have the rest of the night just get worse.

Thanks for being here for me, I don't know what I'd do without you mom's my friends, I love you all, you have been a God-send to me, just looking and looking one day for somewhere to go in all the pain I was in and just happened upon this site. How blessed is that????

God Bless and (((((((((((hugs))))))))) back Shirley :)

love you all
Bette
Timmy's mom

Hey Crazy one,
You are so right about being blessed about finding the site and we also blessed that you found and have you with us now. We are so sorry your night worsened and that is very strange how you woke up at the exact time. One of the first weeks after we lost Lisa on a Thursday night (the night she was murdered) at the exact time that 911 was called to report her screams we heard horrifying screams that sounded just like her. We both pretended we didn't hear them and after a minute or two we just looked at each other. It turned out it was some neighbor kids on a trampoline but the time and the day leave us to wonder what any of it means. Perhaps Timmy was trying to come to you in some way to comfort you knowing how difficult it has been for you and that this particular night you needed him more. Try and hang in there and know we are always here for you and just a phone call away. All of our love..Laura & AV