WELCOME TO MOMS MESSAGEBOARD

https://www.facebook.com/groups/MOMSmemorialoflove

You can find on Facebook at:

M.O.M.S (Mothers of Murdered Sons/Daughters)

 

Debbie Wiley – MOMS Founder 

 

WELCOME TO MOMS MESSAGEBOARD
Start a New Topic 
Author
Comment
Each day brings more sorrow

This weekend has been crazy for me. I must say the best part of it was getting to meet Laura/AV and Barb! You guys are the best! Wish we met in another way.

Well one of my good friends husband died on Sunday, it was out of no where, he had been sick off and on for 2 years but nothing that was life threatening. He went to the hosp as his face was swollen and they ran tests and nothing came up so they sent him home at 1AM, she went to wake him up the next morning and he was gone. I'm so sad for her, she is a mess. She has 5 kids, they knew each other since they were like 14 years old, her kids are teenage and up.

Then my Matt went away 4:30AM, get a call from him saying that something came up on his record (which he had younger but found not guilty on) and they screamed at him because it was not on his form (recruiter told him he didn't have to put on) so they said he may not go on Friday to Ft. Benning. I called the recruiter up and believe it or not the guy did call me back last night! He said as far as he knew things were cleared and everything should be ok now. Then more on Joe, but don't want to go into all that in open forum, but just to give you an idea, his records were mixed with another persons and everything is all screwed up. I spent most of my day off on the phone yesterdy or half in tears with all the stuff that's going on. There is a limit, and I've reached mine. Now I come to work and the guy I cover for is out sick, so now I'm twice as busy plus I wasn't here yesterday and just getting frustrated.

Anyway, I don't know if I mentioned that the next pre-hearing (status) is now on 3/5/09. Another day to just wait and dread, even though you know it's just paper work flowing back & forth, it's just one more day closer to the trial. I feel like crap, what can I say !!!!

Thanks for letting me vent and sending prayers my way. As always you guys are always in mine, every night I pray you all find some comfort somewhere and God is with you always.

Bette
Timmys mom

Re: Each day brings more sorrow

Sorry to hear that you have been going through all that this week. But I totally understand, I lost a great co-worker over the weekend, he was a nice person with a great family and a real happy person who was always trying to comfort people who need it, like me. He just went to his vacation place to get it ready for the family this weekend and was found dead, no sickness or warning at all. Such a sweet person.

My daughter-in-law just found out during a routine wellness checkup that she is diabetic and has cervic and uteran cancer. She just turned 35 yesterday. It sounds like they can help her with surgery, but you never know. Sometimes it's like a BIG test to see just how much we can take before cracking up completely. One day at a time I guess.

luv,Donna Randy;s mom

Re: Each day brings more sorrow

Bette.
What on earth is going on? I don't even know what to say except they were lucky you talked to them on the phone or I am sure the waving finger would have come up and we know they are in trouble then! I am glad Matt's things got worked out or appeared to--he is such a cutie! Are you sure they don't have footage of Joe's mom throwing duffel bags to other residents??? I know it isn't funny but you need to hang in there..it is so frustrating that people have such difficulty just doing their freakin' job but expect every one else to follow the rules!!! But then again you do your job and get rewarded with someone else's cause they can't do it...I am so sorry about your friend that is awful...she must be devastated and I am sure your heart is very heavy for her and her family. Why does it seem like there is no limit for us sometimes and it just keeps coming one after another but we must stay strong and I know you can do that. You have made it this far and you know we are always here for you. We enjoyed visiting with you & Matt...it was like we had known each other forever and you made us feel so welcome. We just finished listening to Timmys Video as that song...Ghetto Gospel..has been playing in my head since we left. That is a very nice video and I am glad we have it...not only do we watch it but so do my girls...you are very dear to all of us and I hope someday you can meet my girls. Kayt is going to try and come in June and I hope we too can come and crash the party. There are no words to say in our situations except that know that we are always thinking about you and will always be here for you. Luv ya...Laura & AV

Re: Each day brings more sorrow

Awwh thank you guys. I'm so glad you were able to visit too, I felt like we've known each other forever, and so saddened by how we met. I know sometimes when I can get myself to watch the cd or the youtubes, the songs stay in my mind for a long time. Timmy and his brother Joe liked Tupac a lot, now there are some I don't and never could understand how they did LOL, but you know how kids are. Anyway when I heard that song, it stuck, it was one I never minded listening to in the car when Timmy (or Joe) would drive with me everywhere and HAD to listen to THEIR music LOL, I'd go crazy!!! Rap is not my thing, you know :)

Well as far as I know things seemed to work out for Matt, well the recruite had called me back, yes I called him LOL, you know I would!!! and he assured me things were straightened out. As for Joe, well, that's still a mess, his whole ID is entangled with someone else witht he same last name, it's a mess. I've been calling the one guy who said he could help me now for 2 days and still didnt get a call back, that's most likely why no home pass, but of course they don't say anything they just let it ride. I'm so glad I had took it upon myself to call because who knows what could have happened.

Well you made me laugh about waving the finger LOL, and no, so far as I know, they never found out about the bag throwing, hehehehehhe.

Joe will get a 10 hour "community" visit instead. He has visiting day this Sunday too. He is taking all this stuff pretty well, I didn't tell him about his ID stuff being screwed up, why make him worry???? I'll get it straightened out.

Life is just one snowball after the other. I'm really trying, I heard on the news today about how stress can really affect a person inside and out and I'm losing more weight and now I can't eat again, not a good sign. Like my friend always says to me, "only you Bett....." LOL how true.

Thanks for being here for me and just letting me vent. Life has been not kind to any of us and these things that may seem trivial take a hold and pile up and somedays I feel like I just can't breathe. I'm sure you all know that feeling. It's just terrible.

Love you all.
Bette
Timmy's mom

Re: Each day brings more sorrow

Dear Sweet Bette Oh how I worried about you on Monday and look you're calling people and standing up for your kids rights and yes probably waving that little finger around LOL.You're stronger than you think and we could all learn a lesson from you.Personally I'd like to visit the QUEENS and wave my finger at them (always got your back Bette)I enjoyed our visit so much I didn't want it to end.Pictures didn't do justice to Matt he is such a cutie and I'm glad we got to meet him in person.Things will work out for Joe too maybe the name switch will bring him home sooner rather than later and by the time they realize the mistake he will be home in your arms again.I too enjoyed Timmy's video as you know till Laura/Av fixed my computer I couldn't get the sound to play on any of the videos.I could at work but not home.Well gotta go to work stay strong lady I know you can.Many Many hugs to you Love Barb

Re: Each day brings more sorrow

Hey Barb, I loved our visit too and wished it didn't go so fast. It's been so crazy lately that I don't even have time to think, last night I was so upset that I felt like I wasn't thinking about Timmy enough and I cried, because my life has so many obstacles in it, and I thought jeez why do I feel this way, he is always on my mind even just back there no matter what happens. Matt was a bit upset last night cause I coudln't go to his little ceremony today, I cried about that too, because of work. Well I let my car to his 2 friends and they drove with me to work and they are going to drive up there for him. Such good friends, but Matt was on the phone holding back sobs I could tell and he was saying how he was already homesick and how he missed Timmy so much, and I told him Timmy would be so proud of him just as much as I am. What a sad time this is, but one for him to be a good start in life, I worry it will be too much for him being how things have been in his life, I hope it helps make him stronger than give up, you know??? I hope we all get together again, I wish we could meet more of the moms, I wish we didn't have to meet this way, oh so many wishes......

Love to all
God Bless
Bette
Timmy's mom

Re: Each day brings more sorrow

Bette I am so sorry that things have been so hard. It seems like things come and go here in cycles. I ALWAYS think of Kaylin but I know I have been staying so busy to keep from falling apart. I also know it isn't really a good thing but it just hurts so much. I do know that getting ready to move and having to go through her things is going to be hard. I have only gone through a few things. We will get to close out her storage and bring everything to the new house. It makes me nervous because I do sit and cry with each thing I touch and find. I only wish she could have moved with us. I know she would have loved helping organize it because she loved doing that. One of the rooms is still being set up as "hers." It'll be a guest room but her things will be what decorate the room. I know she will be there though.

I do hope things work out for Matt and Joe. No matter how old they get or if they are here or not we still have to look out for them and be the Mama don't we? I will keep you in my prayers.