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Debbie Wiley – MOMS Founder 

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It's gonna be difficult

Hi Moms,
I was thinking of how my Christmas will never be the same because my son(Reginald) was born on Christmas Day.I really just feel like I don't want Christmas to come because I just know the spirit will not be there.I have a 10 year old and I know it's not fair to him to have to see me feel bad during the holiday season but I don't know how to get through this, It's so hard to hide.I just don't feel like I can function anymore.Sometimes I feel like I am in my own world, lost and can't get out of this misery.I pray and I pray but, sometimes it just look like it don't help but I know I have got to trust God.What else can I do?

Re: It's gonna be difficult

Hi, wow I have a son also born on Christmas Day, he will be 21 this year, my son Timmy who was killed at the age of 15, his birthday is New Years Eve. He will be 17 this year, his last b/d he would have been 16, we missed his sweet 16 b/d and it was so very very hard. It's hard enough around the holidays but to have your children's b/d's on them makes it twice as harder. I also try to keep a front for my one son who is home with me, my oldest is away in a program and this makes my holidays even worse. I now am getting teary eyed just even thinking of it. Just try and stay strong, that's the best I can say right now as I am not one to give out any good solid advice :) my life is tumbling apart around me, but I get up every day and still get thru it, I don't know how, but I do and I do it for my other boys, I try and stay strong for them. I do so understand what you are going thru. To have 2 holiday babies, and one killed and then my oldest not home, just me and my middle son I think this year is going to be worse on me. I feel the pain already stabbing at my heart. I wish you all the best and keeping you in my prayers.

God Bless
Timmy's mom

Re: It's gonna be difficult

Oh Ladies,
My heart is breaking for you and all the moms who are going into the holidays. It is hard, there is no easy way of going through holidays and birthdays but to have them on the same day must be sooooo hard.
I have found for myself, that Christmas is best with the least amount of fuss and people. We have dinner and friends and family on Christmas Eve and Christmas I don't do anything, nothing, I stay in my PJ's we fix left overs and if I feel like it I stay in bed all day and I don't apoligise to anyone. I found that changing the main event to the night before just some how helps, I'm not sure why but it took the pressure off. My son that lives nears comes over with his family, his dad, my daughter her man and our grand daughter,some of our closest friends and anyone who does not have a family close by is invited for the evening, then the next day is mine and my husbands.
It just seem to help to not have to celebrate.
All my prayers are with you.
With Love and Light

Re: It's gonna be difficult

I am so not looking forward to the Holidays my Jimmy will be gone one year on Dec. 16th last Christmas is just a blur. I just want it over with already. I decided to invite my family to my house this Thanksgiving it will give me something to do to try to keep my mind off the fact that this is my first Thanksgiving without my son. I hope to have my granddaughter on Christmas she told me she wanted to spend Christmas with me. I know Jimmy will be here with us along with my dad in sprit that is.
Holidays will never be the same for any of us we just have to get through the best we can. Deborah I will remember your son on Christmas and will light a candle for him and Bette I will light one for Timmy on New Years Eve.
Love and Hugs to you all
Jimmy's Mom Shirley