dear celeste, i'm new to this group. we've paid a terrible price to be part of this group, and you have paid double. It's beyond my ability to think how horrible this is for you. I've read your story from the beginning and the comments. the last post was a few months ago, and you had started college and had begun to fight against gang violence. you have a beautiful name and it sounds like you have a beautiful heart, too. In my heart I want to join with the others who pray for you and your two children who are still on earth for God's comfort moment by moment and for peace concerning the question of "why?" My son who was murdered was my only son. I have four beautiful daughters. Until this happened, I didn't know the depth of a mother's grief nor did I have any idea how terribly difficult it is for the siblings. If you don't mind my asking, what are the names of the children who are living in heaven, and what are the names of the children who still live on earth? I understand that there are two boys and two girls. I think there should be a group for the siblings, too, don't you?