i went to my first counseling session and i think i am going to like it because she is the first one that has said to me "your daughter didnt just die she was murdered."i guess its because in my selfish mind it is much harder when you have some one just ripped away from you with out any notice then some one who knows they are sick and are going to die the reasoning for my thoughts like that is because even though its still grief when that person dies you have whatever time that person has left to spend as much time with that person making memories.i hope i havent made anyone feel bad like i said its just my selfish feelings
Counseling does help. Your counselor was right. When your child is murdered, it is a whole new ball-game. You are dealing with betrayal, homicide, postponed pre-trials, the trial, the court, judges who use their platform to miscarry justice, who are arrogant, rude, and with no character, other people's responses to your child's death/murder and much, much more. You are not selfish at all. Believe in yourself and you have a right to your grief and feelings. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Lovingly, Sherry
Murder is different a woman who lost her son asked me how long my son had been gone, I told her Jim was murdered on Dec. 16 2007. She said to me it doesn't matter how they pass the grieving is the same. Maybe it is but I told her it is as natural for me to say my son was murdered as it was for her to say her son passed away. I left it at that,,, She didn't have to go through a trial and listen to all the lies from the defense, she didn't have to sit in a court room having the monster who murdered her child sitting with a smug look on his face or smiling at her. She doesn't have to live with the fact that her tax dollars are supporting the monster who murdered her child, or sit and wait for a year or more hoping the first appeal will be turned down or the second. She got to hug her child, tell him how much she loved him. You are not selfish, even those parents who have lost a child in another way don't understand what it is to have your child murdered.
Hugs Jim's Mom