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Frances (Ruben's mom)
 IP: 71.102.174.217 Feb 28, 08 - 12:45 PM |
1 year
Thursday last week was the one year anniversary of my son's murder. I had been crying for a week, not knowing what the hell am I going to do with out this light in my life. We had a mass in the morning and then had a priest go to the parking lot where he was killed that night, When the priest arrived he mentioned to me that he though maybe about 5-10 people would be there. When he arrived there was at least 100 to 110 people there to remember my son. I am not thinking of it as the date's as the days, like Wed. was the day he was killed, thursday we were making arrangements, monday was the arraignment for the murder and his accomplice, monday night was the rosary, and tuesday I buried my son. It is like I relived it every moment of the phone call to the minute they laid him to rest. I know alot of people think that I am more fortunate because I have grandchildren, but you don't know how mean and cruel some people are, for instance his girl friend (the mother of his children) is angry at me right now for talking to a girl that he was seeing before he was killed, because she didn't want anything else to do with him and she threw him out like a piece of trash, so he met this girl. anyway off track sorry, She hadden let me see the kids for almost a week, when I usually see these kids everyday. I finally went to grief counseling yesterday and she told me to call her and not to say I was sorry for anything because I didn't do anything wrong I told her I wanted to see my Brie, Sure she replied and I went to pick her up and her mother had nothing to say to me when she ususally talks to me and I feel like I don't understand how people can be so cruel they know that all I have left of my son is his 3 kids and they resemble him so much especially Brie, To not think that I am in enough pain because the lost of my son but to also take them away from me also. I am sorry I am feeling sorry for my self, How is everyone else doing, Good as can be expected I am sure, Thank you for letting me vent as usual. With love and respect Frances |
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jan
IP: 86.22.135.217 Feb 28th, 2008 - 5:32 PM |
Re: 1 year
i feel your pain and my heart goes out to you '. what horrors thay are out there' you lost your son your best friend . people care i care be strong for your child' if you need a friend im hear for you love jan xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx |
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Angie-Eugene's Mom
IP: 70.190.217.121 Feb 28th, 2008 - 5:57 PM |
Re: 1 year
Frances, I am sorry that this girl is treating you so bad. Even if you're the one having to go and pick up the kids when you want to see them Go and pick them up. I pray that she lets you have them whenever you want to see them. That's all you need is to have your grandchildren taken away too. I don't understand how people can be so cruel. One night in one of my support groups that I go to I mentioned that I was going to leave a little early to take care of my grandaughters and one women says to me, " I envy you, at least you have grandchildren." How the hell did she know that those granddaughters were my sons children? Yes, my son did leave me grandchildren but they live out of town. In May it will be one year for my son Gene. We also are going to have a mass for him and a picnic at the park for family and friends. Everytime I think of that comming up I get anxiety and my stomache turns because I don't know how I am going to get thru that day. But, I see you did it. You give me hope. We need to try to be strong for our sons Frances. The other day I was having a bad day. I was just getting bad news from everywhere. I started feeling sorry for myself and just sat on my bed crying my eyes out. Then I could see Gene standing there and telling me, " Hey, where is the strong women that I used to call Mom?" And I got up and told the devil to leave me alone. That I was not going to give up this fight. I know my mijo is going to help me get thru this. I have to. To honor his life. My heart and prayers go out to you and your family. Take care and God bless you. And remember, you are not alone. Hugs |
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