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| Viewing Page 1 of 1 (Total Posts: 7) |
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alee/josh bunton's\ mom
 IP: 65.104.144.11 Dec 6, 07 - 2:28 AM |
feeling so alone
This month Joshua would have turned 20yrs old yet instead of a party and getting ready for christmas am going to visit his grave site to place flowers and a small gift upon it.My god how i just want to sleep this month away cause my family members dont understand my soul is slowly dying i feel like they murder me on that ill-fate day (04/03/07) cause i cant stop this cancer from spreading am scared one day it's going to win and am going to just give up cause i cant keep running from this pain thats has tore my family apart. |
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joann hubert mom
IP: 69.31.155.253 Dec 6th, 2007 - 6:11 PM |
Re: feeling so alone
hello alee my name is joann my son hubert was murdered july 27 2007 i to know your pain some time people don't know how or what to say some people just wan'ts us to move on with our lives.but thay are not walking in our shoes,if thay do thay will understand what we go thru .each day of ourlives.we just can not turn it off like the radio or tv. we will live with this till the end of our lifes in time the tears will dri a little. just know god will wipe all ours tears away .i will keep you in my prayers joann-hubert -mom lol. |
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deb(dwaynesmum)
IP: 124.176.145.102 Dec 7th, 2007 - 2:25 AM |
Re: feeling so alone
hi alee,i too know what u are going through and i feel the same way,please know u are in my thoughts and prayers, stay strong we can only pray that there is a light at the end of the tunnel,much love to u are your family.love from deb xx |
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Michele (Raymund Mom)
IP: 24.207.175.10 Dec 7th, 2007 - 4:28 AM |
Re: feeling so alone
Hello Alee,,my name is Michele my son Raymund was murdered on 9/25/07 he was my only child ,,it is so hard to move on with your life after a tragedy happens but with God and friends it makes it a little easier, but i have my days when i just want to sleep and not get out of bed but I pray for strength and with the help of the Lord,,we will make it through, cry, cry, I cry all the time and it is really hard with the holidays coming,,But i have 4 grandchildren to help raise,,so that makes it a little better and my oldest granddaughter looks so much like him I have him with me in the kids..So stay strong and with our moms her we can make it .. |
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Darien
IP: 4.88.118.58 Dec 15th, 2007 - 7:02 AM |
Re: feeling so alone
Hi Alee, I understand what it feels like to be alone also. Even though I have family members that are close bvy all they seem they want me to do is get over it and move on with my life. They offer platitudes and"wods of wisdom". Sometimes I just want to scream at them and tell them to walk in my shoes and see if they could just go on. I can't imagine anything worse than having your child murdered. It has been 18 months now and a lot of times it feels like yesterday. I see Keara's children fairly often and I love seeing them but it also is so sad for me to see them groeing up without their Mom. I was in excrutiating pain before Keara died because of back problems and I prayed to God every nite to take the pain away and then Keara was murdered and I felt and feel pain that I can't compare to anything else in my life. I have learned that people I thought would be supportive have not been and don't even call me but luckily I have found other people in my life that do. I live alone though and am now on disability so I am alone a lot. Going through this experience makes you question everything including what you have to live for. I am working part time and have joined the Nc Coalition Against Domestic Violence Speakers Bureau since Keara was murdered by her boyfriend. I know that Keara would want me to try to help others and that is the only thing in my life that gives me any kind of peace. I don't know when or if this will ever get better. There have been lots of times that I have just wanted to die myself but I have other children and grandchildren and even though they live far away. I can't cause them any more pain than they have already have. By telling you all of this I just want you to know you are not alone. I care and feel for every mom that finds herself here. This wasn't what we had in mind for our children but at least we have each other. Love you and hang in there. Love, Darien |
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Kayt Fossler
IP: 216.134.249.67 Dec 15th, 2007 - 7:58 AM |
Re: feeling so alone
Here is a Christnas poem I hope it brings you some peace My First Christmas in Heaven I see the countless Christmas Trees Around the world below With tiny lights Like heaven's stars Reflecting on the snow The sight is so spectacular Please wipe away that tear For I am spending Christmas With Jesus Christ this year I hear the many Christmas songs That people hold so dear But the sounds of music can't compare With the Christmas choir up here I have no words to tell you The joy their voices bring For it is beyond description To hear the angels sing I know how much you miss me I see the pain inside your heart But I am not so far away We really aren't apart So be happy for me dear ones You know I hold you dear And be glad I'm spending Christmas With Jesus Christ this year I send you each a special gift From my heavenly home above I send you each a memory of My undying love After all "love" is the gift More precious than pure gold It was always most important In the stories Jesus told Please love and keep each other As my Father said to do For I can't count the blessing Or love he has for each of you So have a Merry Christmas And wipe away that tear Remember I am spending Christmas With Jesus Christ this year. author........ unknown |
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brenda carpenter
IP: 75.142.202.31 Dec 17th, 2007 - 6:28 PM |
Re: feeling so alone
Hi Alee, my son, Mark was murdered 4-3-05, same day two years earlier. I believe I know how you feel. I'm facing the third Christmas without my son. The pain changes but it does not go away. Take care of yourself, take the holiday's slow and don't worry about anyone but yourself and immediate family. God bless... |
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