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TERRY{CEDRIC\'S}MOM
 IP: 69.153.221.50 Nov 6, 07 - 12:52 PM |
NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
I to know how it feel. my life feels over and I am having a hard time dealing with all of this. I am 38 years old and had my son young I was 17years old and he was my only son and he was my best friend he was the only person that I could really talk too. Now I just stay inside I only go outside 1 time every 30 days to go to the store and when I need other things I send my boyfriend I have lost my fait and don't know what to belive anymore and I don't have notthing but sadness in my life.I have a 3 year old that I can't even take out side what did any of us do to have this pain put in our life? I have always help others and now I feel like why ? because in this world evil wins now I sad is that I never felt this way before when he murdered my son he murdered me he took everything and then after he murdered my son he murdered someone else how can he still not be in jail I just don't understand any of this .I need help this my sound crazy but if anyone of you moms can help me to understand death,to help me to start back in beliving please do so I belive in God but someone told me that when we die that there is no heaven and that heaven and hell is right here on earth and thats why they say ashes to ashes and dust to dust and that our soul live on only because we will never forget that person so what and the hell dose that mean that I will never see my baby again? I don't understand so can someone help me please? Terry {Cedric's}mom and one of your sister moms |
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Bette
IP: 216.237.180.2 Nov 6th, 2007 - 2:08 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
I truly need to believe that I will see my son again. I have to, it's what keeps me going. I also have 2 other boys, they are older but I need to be there for them too. You have to stay strong, it's easier said than done. But think you want to make sure your little one remembers the good times, not the bad. It's hard, but vent all you want. I wish I had words of wisdom, I do not, but you are not alone. Maybe join a self help group (I can't do groups but I am seeing a therapist) one good one is Compassionate Friends. I am so sorry for your loss and hope you find comfort. I cry all the time and I write a journal some days I don't, but then there are days I need to write in there just my thoghts and my heartbreak. God Bless Bette Timmy's Mom |
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deb
IP: 121.219.2.47 Nov 6th, 2007 - 5:15 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
hi terry,its deb dwaynes mum,and i know what u are saying,i to have lost my faith,i dont know what to believe is there heaven? i dont know.i hope there is but i dont no anymore,sometimes i think that dwayne is gone just gone,and when i die im gone too,no where just gone,like asleep but u just dont wake up.some times i dont think we will see each other ever again,but because that hurts to much,to think that it may be the truth,that really hurts,so i then pray that there is a heaven and that i will see my son again,but really i dont no.so its easier to believe that one day we will see them again,because what else can we do?this world that we live in is crazy,the evil people live on, and the good ones die,i just dont understand.i'm sending u all the love i can,and just no that our boys are safe now, at least no one can hurt them again, where ever they are.hugs and love to u,love from Deb dwaynes mum xxxxx |
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Kay mom of Joshua Delaney
IP: 165.236.67.225 Nov 6th, 2007 - 5:37 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Terry I took this off of my sons website, it helps me to read it from time to time: Isaiah 51:11: 11 Therefore the redeemed of the LORD shall return, and come with singing unto Zion; and everlasting joy shall be upon their head: they shall obtain gladness and joy; and sorrow and mourning shall flee away. We must resist sorrow and grief and ask for God's peace and comfort when we face loss and heartache. If we submit unto God and resist the devil, then the tormenting grief and pain caused by the devil, will have to flee. James 4:7: Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Here is a sample prayer you can offer to God: Father God, Thank You for always being there for me no matter what I face. I know You will never fail me, even in my most intense trials. I have not always understood why I was going through certain things; however, I do not have to understand, because You are God and You are in control, in spite of my lack of understanding. I know that all You require of me is to trust You, and look to You in faith and You will come and save me, and bring me an answer. You always have, and You always will, because you are faithful. You never fail any of us who look to You. I have failed You, Lord, by my doubt and unbelief at times, but You have never failed me. Lord, please remove all the sorrow and grief I feel. Heal this pain I feel in my heart and help me to trust You more. Fill this empty place in my heart with more of Your Spirit. I ask this in the name of the Lord, Jesus Christ. Amen |
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joann hubert mom
IP: 69.31.155.253 Nov 6th, 2007 - 7:24 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
i am sorry you feel that way if you look in genesis god created the heaven and earth.i find that some people have different belief.you may search for a church home.please do not give up on god he keep us going each day that whats the devil what to keep you down to still your mind and body. an soul. you have to be strong you will see your son i know you will look in psalm 27 psalm 23. i will pray for you my sister. please do not let the devil still your joy we will see our love one soon. |
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Angie-Eugene's Mom
IP: 70.190.217.121 Nov 7th, 2007 - 9:15 AM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Hi Terry, I am feeling just like you are. Yesterday was 6 months that my angel has been gone from me. And I miss him sooo much. I was only 15 when I had him, my only son, the oldest of my three children. I found this in a book that I was reading and when I start thinking those awful thoughts about death I read this and it helps me. I hope it brings some comfort to you. God Bless You Terry, don't give up. "Life does not end when we die. Death is a rebirth into a spirit world of light, and love. A transition from the physical to the spiritual that is no more frighting or painful than passing between rooms through an open doorway. It is a joyful homecomming to our natural home." |
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Brenda
IP: 64.12.116.12 Nov 7th, 2007 - 1:59 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Terry, I know there is a Heaven and a Hell. I also know Wendy is waiting in Heaven for me. She was saved when she was 9 years old. The night, I found Wendy's cremated remains in the trunk of her car, my mind started taking me to a safe place. I said to myself, "I am walking through the gates of Hell" I heard God say to me, "I am here holding your hand." He and I had a conversation. I know God is real.. Wendy had been gone for a few months and I kept praying and praying for God to give me a sign, Wendy walked happily in Heaven. That she did not miss her children or other family members. After several months of praying for this, I almost gave up hope. One day, going to the cemetery with her oldest son, Aaron, I was praying again for a sign. I had not been able to go to the cemetery due to a tornado that hit not far from where I lived. We suffered wind damages and trees over turned, and two days of heavy, heavy rain. I had planted a rosebush on Wendy's grave a few days before the tornado hit. I thought about the rosebush and wondered how much damage was done to it. Anyway, on the way there, I prayed again for a sign and thought, God, show me through her rosebush that she walks happily with you. Wendy's son had fallen a sleep on the way there. I got out of my truck to look over the brick wall to check on her rosebush. I saw it was in full bloom. It had so many red roses on it, I started thanking God for this sign. I heard him say, "Go look." I said, "Lord, I can't. Aaron is a sleep." I heard again this time, a booming voice that scared me. "I said, GO LOOK NOW." I said, "OK, Lord." I walked through the gate and went over to her grave. Terry, I really started to cry then. At the foot of her grave, and the top of her grave, I could step down about a foot to a foot and a half. All around her rosebush the ground was totally intact. Nothing was hurt on her rosebush. I got the sign, I prayed for. Since, that day, I have known peace, Wendy is happy. Keep the faith, Sweet Terry. Keep praying and God will send you a sign that you so desperately need. Our children are in Heaven with him. They are waiting to take our hand, once we cross through the gates of Heaven. One more thing Terry.. The devil wants you to believe that God does not exist. He wants you to turn away from God. The devil lies.. He does not want you happy. He wants your soul.. Turn to God and you will see your precious Cedric again one day.. If you ever need to talk, send me your phone number, I will call you. Love and hugs, Brenda |
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connie marchant
IP: 216.166.159.185 Nov 7th, 2007 - 5:14 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Terry, I know that there is life after death and that our children are near. I have had alot of signs from Justin and there is no doubt that someday we will all be together again and the people that did this to our children will be in hell! If you believe in prayer, pray often and you will get comfort from this. I think Satan plays on us all because he thinks we are weak and would love it if we didn't believe in God and life after death. Don't let him win!!! Thoughts and Prayers, Connie |
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jan
IP: 86.22.135.217 Feb 28th, 2008 - 3:26 PM |
Re: Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
i do belive life after death iv opend my own site on goon too soon called wings of angels. i want to let you all no your child may not be with in body 'but thay are with you in spirit. my granson levi died at six months old and i miss him so much' after his death i started to see loved ones that have passed over. so i started to give people messages of them. if you wauld like to no how you can help yourself to contact them ;are you wauld like me help you' . come on my site im hear for you .......jan xx |
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deb
IP: 121.219.2.47 Nov 7th, 2007 - 6:50 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
hello mums,well terry i hope all the advice the mums have given you is helping you,as it is helping me,Brenda what happened at the cemetery is a sign,so now i feel alot better knowing that my son is safe now in the afterlife,i am looking forward to the day i can join him.love to you all |
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Brenda
IP: 64.12.116.12 Nov 7th, 2007 - 7:57 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Deb (Dwaynes mum), I did not want to write a book when I posted earlier. I want to tell you before all the books that came out or people talking about their near death experience with seeing the white light. My sweet grandmother broke her hip in 1978. While in surgery, she suffered a heart attack and died. The doctors and the surgery team were able to bring her back. After she was better (still in the hospital) she wrote a journal what she saw in Heaven. In the journal, she wrote, I saw all my loved ones standing at the Gates of Heaven. When I went to open the gate, they told me, "Go back Myrtle, it is not your time." I told them, "Open it, I want to come in." The kept telling me, "No, it was not my time. Go back." She looked around and wrote of the beautiful things she saw and how peaceful it was. That she did not want to go back. She wanted to stay with her loved one. I believe the reason she was sent back, was to write this for people to read. She died a month or so later. My aunt still has my grandmother's journal. I know of two others that have had near death experiences. It is peaceful when you die. Nothing but love.. no tears, no fears. Peace, comfort and hugs, |
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joann hubert mom
IP: 69.31.155.253 Nov 8th, 2007 - 8:06 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
terry you know what,s the hardest thing for me is that day my son was murdered i felt somthing was wrong that day was wird i could not explain it i call his cell all day even when he was home.an did not know he was home.i to seen things some time in my dreams. or get the chills.i felt my son that nite.he die he held my hands.thay ware so cold i tride to pull my hands.under the covers.i was cold that nite |
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jackie Tommy's momma
IP: 204.73.103.253 Dec 31st, 2007 - 11:37 AM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Terry, I hope you take the advice of the mom's who like myself believe that God is truth and love. he is the only way you will find sanity in this evil world, I too had my wonderful, loving ,kind and beautiful young son taken away by homicide, like every mother who suffers this torment and their are way too many of us, I did not know how I was going to live another day with Tommy gone . The Lord God and only God and the promises he has made us have lifted me up and given me peace. You will see Cedric again. and that's the truth, Terry please don't let the devil do anymore damage than he already has done, kick him out and kick out his messengers......Love and Peace to you and your baby girl. Jackie |
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Tracey (Terrell's MOM)
IP: 70.105.3.149 Jan 1st, 2008 - 6:43 PM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Hey Ms. Terry Girl: When you wrote this post, I was caught up in going back to school so I didn't get a chance to write at the time. I know how you feel, I think even the most faithful of us, loses or questions their faith when their child is taken from them especially through murder. I too have my days when I think why would a loving God take our precious children from us. But then I think of how the bible said that God loved Mary (Jesus mother) but yet he didn't even spare her the pain of watching of son betrayed and slaughtered on a cross. Anyone that reads the bible knows that the good suffer in this world and evil seems to prosper. God loved Abel, yet he didn't stop Cain his brother from murdering him. John the Baptist was beheaded yet God and Jesus truly loved him. King Herod killed million of innocent babies in an attempt to stop Jesus from growing into manhood. I know it sounds stupid, but I trust God, I don't understand why bad things happen to good people but they do. Don't listen to people who don't believe there is another life and this life is all their is because something in my soul tells me its not. Earth is the testing ground for which I think all our children passed because the good dies young and Heaven is the reward. The bibie says honor thy father and thy mother and you will be given a long life. I know Terrell honered me and my husband yet he was killed at the age of 22. Is God a liar? I don't think so. I know that Terrell does have a long life, he has life everlasting and will live for eternity. I know some MOMS disagree with me, that ok because I know I have no answers to this horrible pain we all feel. Please fight pass your grief and if you do nothing else, be strong for Miss Breshea (sorry if I spelled it wrong). She needs to be strong in this evil world and only her strong beautiful mother can teach her how. Being strong for her honors Cedric so please don't let Satan take more from you than he already has. I did read a book that really helped me with my grief. The book is Heaven by Randy Alcott and really did helped me put Heaven in perspective and brought me a little bit of peace that all my loved ones are safe and happy in Heaven. I love you girl and know that you are always in my prayers. Tracey |
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Maura (Melissa's mom)
IP: 216.27.76.216 Jan 2nd, 2008 - 6:32 AM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Tracey, I totally agree with you. We will never know in this lifetime why this has happened to our children. But God is good and the bible says he is close to the brokenhearted. And he is the God of all comfort. I think of Mary and what she bore seeing her son spit on and mocked, beaten and crucified. And that was God come in the flesh for us so we can have eternity with him. I know Melissa along with all of our children are with Jesus and we will one day be united again. And in those times when we are feeling so much pain and hurt, when we think we can't go on another minute without our baby, Jesus is right there with us. When we all get to heaven we will have all the answers but when we are, those answers won't matter. Because we will be with our children again, never to be separated. But in this life I ask God to use me to help others that will go through tragedy and pain and overwhelming grief in their lives. I want something good to come from Melissa's death. What the enemy meant for evil, God will make good out of it. I too have read the book Heaven by Randy Alcorn. It is so good and it does give you a different perpective on heaven. It made me feel closer to Melissa. I pray for 2008 for God to pour out his love on all MOMS and to wrap his arms around you each second that you feel you can't go on anymore. To hold you tight and speak peace into your hearts and that the memories you all have will sustain you until you are together again. That at just the whisper of the name of Jesus will bring a flood of comfort and hope for the future. Much love and hugs, Maura (Melisss's Mom) |
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Michelle Dye (Brandon Fluet\\\\'s mom)
IP: 64.12.116.12 Jan 2nd, 2008 - 11:39 AM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
My dear sweet terry my heart just broke as i read your frustration, anger and confusion over the murder of your beloved Cedric!!! I just wanted to let you know that your not alone, we are all feeling the same pain, hurt, confusion, and anger. I needed to let you know that THERE IS A HEAVEN!!!! and that our beloved son's are there now walking with our King. and when our time on this earth is over our boys will be standing at the gates of Heaven, arms open wide, and will welcome us with the hug we all have been longing for!!! I know how you feel sweet terry, I am just as angry at my son's killer and wonder every day...why in God's name we live in a society where people can so violently take the life of another human being with no remorse or regret. but just as I know within the deepest part of my soul that there is a Heaven, I know just as well that there is a Hell. Cedric's killer may have escaped the justice and punishment in this world, but he will NEVER EVER escape his final judgement and will suffer for an eternity the consequences of his actions!! Just know that we are ALL here for you and were traveling down that same dark tunnel of grief with you. I pray that Cedric will send you a special touch from Heaven to let you know he's ok and that he's still with you, watching over you, and waiting for you. stay strong dear terry for your son and for the child you still have here with you. Just take peace in knowing that even though you can't see Cedric anymore doesn't mean he's not still with you!!! I truely love you and understand exactly what your going through!! I will be here for you and we will ALL get through this together...hand in hand...heart to heart!! a friend and a fellow mother in grief michelle (Brandon Fluet's mom) |
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Karen Wes's mom
IP: 75.162.199.60 Jan 9th, 2008 - 5:57 AM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Terry, Wow. So many replies to your post has helped me to feel better today. I think that finding MOMS has held "teachings" from the lesson I'm suppose to learn because my son was murdered. I want to suggest a million books. Many of which I still need to read. I find comfort in their pages, and I am always on the look-out to acquire more of them. Since I can't read as fast as I bring them home I have scanned and broused through all of them at my leisure. My favorites are bedside. Perhaps on your monthly trip into the land on the other side of your door you could drop by the library and flip through some about loss, soul, the afterlife, near death experiences, the spirit world and after death communication. I plan on reading them all but for now I think a book does not have to be read from cover to cover in order to get what I need from it. I know I'll get to it after I finish the next one. I just take a few bites here and there to satisify my need, cure my ache and comfort me. I'll confess...... another topic that has a hold of me is true crime. I think it helps me keep my pain in check. Twisted coping skills I'll admit, but for me it helps. I'm going to reread the replies to your post, they are wonderful, like the MOMS who wrote them. Karen Wes's mom |
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Beverly D. Leah's mom
IP: 98.160.159.109 Jan 13th, 2008 - 1:32 AM |
Re: NEED HELP SO PLEASE MY SISTER HELP ME WITH THIS. LOVE YOUR SISTER MOM TERRY{CEDRIC'S}MOM
Terry, Thank you for your post. It has made me feel better also, and I hope it has helped you, knowing that we are in the midst of other moms who are so kind and caring. I love you all. I know that you don't like to go out, and you do have a computer. Go to ebay, or amazon.com, and look up some books. One that I have been reading (started so long ago, but life has been pretty awful here) is one minute after you die. It is fantastic, and there are so many others, that will help you. Near death experiences are true. I do believe that Leah, Cedric, and all the others will be waiting for us, and I look so forward to that day. I don't want to rush it, I think I still have work here on earth, but I long for the day that I will hold her again, and I just imagine how wonderful it will be. Keep those thoughts, remember when you were pregnant? In your ninth month, all big, and tired and just dying to see that little baby in your tummy? Well, that is how I look at it. Just have patience, and faith, you will get your baby back. |
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